But that equation still leaves room for redundancies and inaccuracies. First of all, starting with "what" isn't necessarily going to attract and retain your audience. There are probably a lot of people who are doing what you're doing, and the details of that "what" may not matter to those who aren't sure they should invest their time/interest in the first place. Instead, your initial message should engage your audience's emotions, which is best accomplished through the element of "why"--go ahead and tell them why they should care. Furthermore, your "what" could be stated directly in your request. For example, if you're a landscape photographer who wants to make a living selling landscape photography prints, instead of starting off your message with, "I sell landscape photography prints," you could end your message with, "Buy my original landscape photography prints by visiting my virtual gallery."
The element "why" can also be simplified. If you want to capture emotion via the expression of your personal reasons for doing what you do, you should avoid saying something like, "I specialize in landscape photography because I enjoy taking pictures of unusual geography." Why would strangers care about your likes and dislikes? It is much easier to tap into emotions by stating an authentic belief: "I believe that capturing and promoting our planet's unique beauty can inspire people to make conscientious environmental choices."
By sharing your personal belief, you can connect emotionally with people who share your belief, the people most probable to respond to your request. But before getting to that request, you should squeeze in a persuasive, audience-centric "why." Your audience's "why" is not about you. It should not be a list of features: "My landscape photographs are printed in black and white, so they will match any decor." Instead, it should be presented as a benefit: "Viewing stunning landscapes everyday in your home or office can reawaken your appreciation for nature and motivate you to do your part in making Earth a healthy, thriving place for generations to come." Better yet, make it both informative and emotional: "With stunning black and white landscape photography greeting you everyday in your home or office, you can reawaken your appreciation for nature and find motivation to do you part in making Earth a healthy, thriving place for generations to come."
Below is the final equation: